What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just shot up a plaground Now Im heading to an orphanage

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Why did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? Peppers help strengthen his immune system.

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want more?

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What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He grew tired of hearing the most over-used joke set up in recorded history.

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Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

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What's worse than sitting through a boring class? Sitting on a bus that a terrorist is about to blow up.

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How do you stop a man from jumping off a building? Push him off a building.

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Micheal Curran...that is all.

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Reading the Terms and Conditions

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We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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-I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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How do you know you're on a blind date with a black person? If they agree to eat at KFC in Compton (Wyndellberg)

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what did the thief say to the man that lost his car? i stole your car.

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My dog poops u pick it up if i poop ill say f@#% you eat it DumbS%^&

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Why is a duck? Because one leg is both the same.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Becuase the farmer has recently gone blind due to old age and he acidently left the gate opened and the chicken happened to walk out

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Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

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why was little jonny not playing in the baseball game? his legs were shattered in a terrible lawn mowing accident.

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Roses are red, Facebook is blue, we have mutual friends, and violets are blue and roses are red. FRIDGE

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What did the elderly lady say to the man? You still have not repaid my services

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knock knock who's there? I'm here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops