Yo mamma is so old that she lives in a retirement home for the aged, and will most likely die there in several years.

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What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

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What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Two holocausts.

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What did the therapist say to the other therapist? Your skin looks dry, let me lend you some ointment.

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Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

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Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

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your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

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What do you call a girl with one leg? Eileen

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there's a worm in my lime at least it doesn't have scurvy

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How many zombies can you kill at once? about one or two unless your Chuck Norris with unlimited powers.

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All of these jokes are about white people

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Why did the camel cross the road? He was off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of OZ.

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Why did Lisa fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock! Who's there? *Definitely not Lisa.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? i lost my tractor

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What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

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When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

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My daughter got a kinder surprise with cool toy today..... i killed her i didnt even want the toy

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A man walks into a bar later at night & the bartender says how was your day the man replies "well I found out my mom is a raging crack addict, my grampa has alzheimer's & i have terminal cancer" how was yours the bartender says "I found out im Hitlers lost son".

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There were two mufins in an oven. They did not say anything because muffins are incapable of speech.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm bad at poetry, ELEPHANTS!

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Excuse me, do you have any gnats? Yes, plenty. Thank you

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Knock Knock Who's there? Rapist :(

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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A man walked into a house, He never came back out as he fell down the stairs and snapped his neck, His family mourn him everyday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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