I put children on a leash and store them under my bed. I feed them bird food and they drink eachothers urine.

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Q: What do you call a barn full of black people? A: Antique farm equipment.

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Did you hear about the guy who lost his whole left side??? Yeah he's all right now!!!

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A white man got injected by Heroin at a party and got instantly addicted.

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Waitress: Would you like to have a drink? Customer: (Looks at the drink's menu) Hmmmm... What are my choices? Waitress: Yes and no.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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why didn't the Asian ask for a calculator cause he was doing the dishes and a calculator seemed inappropriate

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a penis and a knife choose which one goes in you.

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What do you call a black guy robbing a store ? A theif

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What's the mosy hardest game in the world? The Impossible Game.

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Why was Timmy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being raped What's worse than being Raped. Being Raped 2 times by a Giant Scorpion.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench isnt going anywhere.

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There's my tractor.

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A frog goes to a lake. he meets a photographer , the frog ask him ( can you take a picture of me? he says: sure ...say cheese.... then the frog said :....yogurt

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What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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How do you confuse Hellen Keller? Put her in a circular room and tell her to find the corner.

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Ask me if I'm a toaster Are you a toaster? No, I'm a tree.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your physician, you're going to die.

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Doctor Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains! Really? Well that's the least of your problems. Your test came up HIV positive.

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An older man and a young boy are holding hands and walking into the woods together. The boy looks up and say, "gee, I'm scared, it's dark in there." the old man answers, "Yeah, just think how I feel....I have to walk out of here alone!"

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Your mother sleeps around so much that I worry that she may be taking too much medicine for her insomnia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops