Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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When does the Narwhal bacon? The Narwhal bacons at mid-night.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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two men are in a bathroom (note they are not in the same stall) the guy on the left says how are you and the guy on the right says hold on im pooping.

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

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your moma is sao fat that she is gay . nope im sorry thats just mean.

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What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

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knock knock. who's there? no one. no one who? no one who?

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Whats worst than a cold? Being shot in the face repeatadly by a rocket launcher until death.

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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What do you call a man covered with cottoncandy and goes to the store and buys a jar of pickles? George

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It may be Stupid but its also Dumb. ~Patrick Star

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Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

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Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

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What size pants did the gorilla wear? An abnormaly large pair compared to the average human because their weight and width are porportionaly larger for their speices.

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womans rights...

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Dani Barton is a stupid GIRL

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How many vikings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Probably just one, though I'd imagine it hard to teach someone from the 9th century C.E. how to, let alone explain electricity.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven three twelve. Am i doing it right?

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Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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