Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.It got ran over by a bus.

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A black and a white walk into a bar, d.r. King would be proud.

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Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

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Some people devote their to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

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Santa Claus and eight reindeers walk into a bar. “Hey, fatty,” the barman shouts. “Where’s Rudolph?” “He’s dead,” Santa replied. “I’m sorry to hear that,” the barman said, looking embarrassed. “Let me get you a drink.”

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why did the boy eat his lunch money? it was his lunch!

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

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Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

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Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How do you keep a dummy in suspense for 24 hours? Tell him his wife suffered from a severe concussion and that he'll have to wait until morning to see if she's okay

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Why was the man burying his child? because in france, fishing is only allowed 3 times a day

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Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

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I'm Coming

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

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What do you call your female dog? Your bitch

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In Soviet Russia you don't drive car, because the Soviet Union was disbanded in 1991

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Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

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Ashton Kutcher meets a fine cougar at a bar and the cougar fatally wounded his throat.

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Man walks into a hotel on Friday, Stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? A. His horses name was Friday

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

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Why did the boy jump off a cliff Because he was gay and committed suicide

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops