whats the difference between a frog and a toad ones a frog

Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because humans do not have the capability of accessing the chickens brain to receive their knowledge and what they were thinking about in the past.

Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

A Mexican, a Chinese man, and a cowboy are on a plane. The plane is crashing, and they need to get rid of anything to make the plane lighter so thet can glide to safety. The cowboy throws out all of his boots and says we have to many of these. Then the Mexican throws out all of his taco shells and says we have to many of these. Then the Chinese man throws out the Mexican and says we have to many of these.(:

What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

What did robin say to batman before they got I the car........ Get in the car.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

why did the boy get hit by a bus because he dropped his ice cream

A black man bites into a watermelon. Just kidding he was white.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

Knock knock Who's there? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

What did Helen Keller say? Obcojbcidjbcidjbdijcbd

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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