Malcolm Johnson from Zenith windows, I was wondering if I could speak to you for a while about some fantastic offers which we currently have on double glazed windows....

A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

Why do black people eat Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because there is Protein in chicken and without protein their bodies would succumb to such diseases as Kwashiorkor and Cachexia.

In Soviet Russia, there was a movement to be renamed into the Russian Federation, which passed on December 25, 1991.

Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

Why did Justin Bieber cross the road? Because the chicken chose him as a decoy.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, In Soviet Russia, Poem writes you.

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

What is stupid, black and high? A stupid black kite.

What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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