why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

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How many babies could a cannibal eat? 132/267 of a baby

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Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

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What does a chicken get for Christmas? A trip to the processing plant.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

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She Explored My Body, Licked, Sucked, Swallowed! When Satisfied, She Left! . . . . Damn Mosquito!!!

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What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing becasue a mute is a person who cannot speak and a deaf man ould not hear the jumbled mumblings anyway.

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How many infants does it take to paint a house? Forty-Seven.

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

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Why is there an owl out during the day? I don't know.

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Why was Joe afraid of Steve? Because Steve raped and killed all of Joe's three children two weeks ago.

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A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

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What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

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Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

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2 guys at a funeral. "did you know the girl?" asks one of the guys. "No" replies the other. "Me neither."

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If you search "fat black man" on Google, you will find many reesults about black people who happen to be chronicly obese.

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What do you call a zebra eating Cheerios? A zebra eating Cheerios.

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How do you save stop your soulmate from dying of cancer? Shoot them on the head.

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your mama's so ugly, she suffers from chronic deppression.

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What did the fat man do? He fell over...

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God hates fags, no...god i'snt real

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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