Why was the mushroom invited to the party? It was because it was a mushroom costume party

what do you when a black guy gives you a muffin. you eat it because he was your waiter.

What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the baby monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

I LOVE MASTURBAITING ALL DAY!!!!

Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

Did u think that last joke was funny? Well this one isnt

What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

What do you call a deer in the wild? a deer

Have you seen the flock of birds? probably not because they hit a window and all died at impact.

Roses are red violets are blue ice-cream is yummy can I eat you

A black guy and a white girl are having sex. The white girl screams "I'm pregnant!!!!" The black guy says "i'll help you take care of it" "I love you sweetie and nothing will come between us"

why was little timmys mother so upset on mothers day? Because he had been abducted earlier that week

i dont fisish anythi

how do you wake up lady gaga? you throw her on the ground.

roses are red violets are blue polar bears are white grass tends to be green

A Chinese man fails a math test

An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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