So there's a monkey in a bar. I forgot the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what its name is.

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

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Person 1 - Did you know there is only evidents of killer whales killing in captivity Person 2 - tell that to my uncle Pete... He's deaf

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What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

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what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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Why was Jimmy so bad at jumping rope? His father's car ran over an IED back in 2009. Jimmy had lost his legs in a tragic explosion.

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Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

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what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

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Knock knock Who's there Orange Orange who Orange

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roses are red violets are blue i take pleasure in the simple things in life as i have nothing else left to live for

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Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither did she.

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Wanna here a funny joke? Will is straight HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA hes gay

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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Lightning strikes 2 year old baby.

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What did the dinosaur say to the koala? Nothing because the dinosaur is extinct and both of which cannot talk.

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How do you get a blond out of tree? Shoot her in the head.

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Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

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What color is the grass on Bob's lawn? Bob lives in a apartment.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the baby monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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I LOVE MASTURBAITING ALL DAY!!!!

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1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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