What do you call a black man in a suit and tie? Presumably affluent

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What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

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Did the single mother survive the plane crash? No.

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What do you call a black man? Rob

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I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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What does the black guy look for when he goes shopping? Some soap for his dead cat in the living room.

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roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

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What is the defference between Obama and an American? Obama doesn't have a birth certificate.

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What do a tree and I have in common? We would both be mad if we got turned into paper.

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A hard-working man, in his early forties with slightly graying hair, arrives to work earlier every day. He values integrity and dedication. His loving wife is proud of his accomplishments and her favorite part of the day is when he arrives home from a day at the office. He is close friends with the Director of HR, because he believes that we all should be respected and treated fairly on the job. Today, there is a board meeting, which he prepared for extensively, because he cares deeply about what happens to this great company. His boss greets him after the meeting is done and says, "Great job, that presentation was even better than yours usually are." It was a very long meeting, so they both end up going to the Men's Room. What does he say when his boss corners him near the urinals and demands sex? Nothing. He doesn't like to talk during sex.

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Q: What did the boy say to the girl? A: Wanna go to homecoming?

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Roses are red Violets are blue this doesn't rhyme i like trains.

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Why did the girl stop smoking? Because her mum asked her to.

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When the mom came home from work, she was very tired. Her son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She says sure and makes one for him. The boy was very happy and ate his sandwich. I was actually lying above. The mom was actually killed by three men in hoodies that were hiding in her backyard. The came inside and also murdered the boy. Worst of all the killers took all of the food and the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat, Guess it doesn't matter since he is gone...

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Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

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Ask me if I'm a car. Are you a car¿ Yes¡

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have you seen stevie wonder's house. no? Well nethier has he you

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Yo' Mama is so fat, her driver's license says, "picture continued on other side."

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Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

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why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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