Did you hear the one about the deaf guy and the rhinoceros? Neither did he.

A Chinese man fails a math test

roses are red violets are blue polar bears are white grass tends to be green

Q: Where's the cheese? Who ate the cheese? A: How do you know it's been eaten because it's gone? Are you making the assumption that food that has disappeared was eaten because that is usually how food disappears? I am filing a lawsuit against you for your malevolent foodism.

What did little Timmy get for Christmas after he was diagnosed with leukemia? A gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond because he was interested in redecorating.

What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

Why is Skrillex so bad a fishing? He has Parkinson's Disease

Q: What did little Jimmy get his grandfather for Christmas? A: Nothing his grandfather died on Thanksgiving

Have you ever tried ethiopian food Neither have they

Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

what's an advantage of breaking every bone in your body? nothing, you're screwed.

A house comes around the corner.

why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

What is your name? My name is Jeff

What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, oceans don't have hands to wave either

THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your pear.

What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

Two guys are walking on a bridge. One has long hair. The other does not care.

Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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