Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

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How did Allen Iverson compose one of the most well known interviews of all time? Practice.

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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An orange walks into a bar....orange you glad I didn't say banana?!?!

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A little boy falls into the mud Wanna hear a clean joke? He takes a bath with bubbles Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Michal Jackson.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

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Why did the woman scream when she saw the mouse? Because she's afraid of technology.

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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how do you have sex? i dont know im under age!

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What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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What's Arabs' cutlery? Bread

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How many dead babies can you fit a bathtub??? It depends on how you slice them!

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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Why was the cancer patient often bullied by his peers? Because he happened to be an extremely bad person. He often annoyed people, was intransigent and often aggravated those around him causing them to bully him.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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Q: How do you get a blonde out of a tree? A: Throw a moneky at her

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Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

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A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A wonderful dairy product that i can not have due to the fact that i do not own it.

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How do you get a Jew into a car? Tell him to get i the car.

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Why is purple the best color. Cuz icecream has no bones

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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What did Ed Gein get at McDonalds? The corpse of a worker he killed by the dumpster and hauled back to his shack to hang up and gut like a deer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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