Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

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Knock knock. Its open.

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how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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roses are red violets are blue maskrosor are gula

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I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

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Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

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two peanuts were walking down the street one was assualted

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What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

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Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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What's the difference between a microwave and hamster? They're both furry except for the microwave

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What do two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

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Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

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A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

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Why did the man leave anti-joke.com? Because he realized that it was time for dinner and the ham was burning.

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What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

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Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

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-Is your refrigerator running? -Yes. -Just wondering.

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What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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