Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

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What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

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How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

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I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red OMFG MY LAWN IS ON FIRE !!!?

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Shltskc gw? G

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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What happened to the alcoholic man that decided to never drink ever again? He died of thirst. Moral: Alcohol was the only available liquid in this twilight zone... Anti anti joke

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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Why did the jewish family move? Their house burnt down. They lost everything and was tragic

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How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

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Why can't Jeff drive a car? because he is a rock.

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

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who is gay wit mon james cornish

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An old man walks into a bar. He drinks 3 beers and dies. The bartender calls paramedics but when the police came they arrested the bartender for beating his wife. A few hours later an earthquake destroys the bar and everyone was evacuated and many were injured. The manager was driving to the scene but has a car accident with the ambulance. It was such a bad day.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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A black man and a mexican man jump off the empire state building.Who wins? Nobody,suicide is a serious thing and it is depressing to think that the minorities In America would do such a thing to themselves.

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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Why did the man answer his cell phone at 3 AM in the morning? Because his phone was ringing and was probably waiting for an important phone call

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what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

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How do you hurt a clown? shoot it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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