Why did the black man go through the window of the house? He left his keys inside

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What did one jobless cancer cell say to the other? Lets go get Jobs.

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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Why did the little boy fall down the stairs? I pushed 'em.

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How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

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Why? Why not?

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Q:Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? A:One less drunk

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What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

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Why are lawers are so scared of Jerry bryant? Because he bites

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Why was the jewish boy crying? i lied he was happy.

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What is the difference between a urologist and a can of chili? One is hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause you touch yourself at night;

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he just got paralized from the waist down and will never be able to walk again.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my life didn't start, until I met you! :) Megan _____

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, the enslavement of blacks over hundreds of years.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? You're mom. It's your.

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what did the bartender say to the customer? a. is it the first option b. is it the second option c. is it the third option.

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i was born with 99 medical problems, and the difficulty to count till 100.

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no.

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How do you drown in a tea cup? You find a big enough tea cup.

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A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

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Yeah, "master hypnotists" (and do not even get me started on hypnotherapists, they completely suck!) keep claiming that you need to keep up to date with the "constantly developing art of hypnosis" The thing is though, that hypnosis does not develop itself, people develop it further, and when the key ingredient is actually believing things under a certain state, you can do anything, even slow the passage of time to a halt. Once I tried that, I was disappointed when I figured out that it did not work, so I went shopping (for groceries), then realized that no time had passed at all, sounds like bullshit, and yeah I wont be trying that again anytime soon, lucid dreaming is good enough, you can spend hours and hours in a lucid dream state, days, and then wake up and figure out you slept like two hours or something.

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What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

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Simon says why the hell are we playing Simon say!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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