Why did the man drop one dozen long stem roses? Because he was hit by a taxi cab

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my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

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what is 3+3= 8

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What do dragonflies do when they are a couple? One sits on the others head, causing the bottom dragonfly to have a loss of vision, and increases the weight on the bottom dragonfly, which increases the chance of both the dragonflies deaths.

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"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

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What's the worst way to say you want to break up? Kill her dog.

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what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a clown, and clowns are scary.

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Did you hear about my new Muslim friend? Hes the bomb!

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Cole and his brother josh tag team jaycie until she cries herself to sleep while Sarah watches

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What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Mary.

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Jimmy is at a movie ? He's with a gay boy

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CHAD'S A FAG!!!

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An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

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hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

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Q: What did the Jewish man say to the Muslim man? A: Hello, how are you today? Nice weather we're having, isn't it?

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I ordered the "Anti-Joke" book Jk, waste of money

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Three old ladies were sitting on a bench. A man walks up and flashes them. The first old lady had a stroke. The second old lady had a stroke. The third old lady called 911 out of concern for her two friends.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

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Q: What do you call a black man that's flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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