A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

69

thumb_up thumb_down -26

So you keep your knowledge sharp do you? When it comes to hypnosis and such?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What is the one thing you can never steal back? Your viginity.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

knock knock whos there i dont know. go look

thumb_up thumb_down -26

KKK: Hey i was just comming over here to invite you to a church gathering me and my buddies are having later on tonight, and afterwards we are going to have a big bon-fire to fire up our spirits. Black guy: OK sounds great. White people sure are nice now-a-days.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what do you make if you get a cow, then kill it. ...Steak

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "We don't serve food here." The sandwich charges the barman for discrimination.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why are you on this sight? You're procrastinating. I am too

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what do you call a black man falling off a cliff holy shit

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

thumb_up thumb_down -26

i think dylan is turnimg gay for amy

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A Priest, a Rabbi and a Shaman walk into a bar. The Bartender looks at them and says "What is this a Joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Two cannibals are eating a clown one turns to the other and asks "does this taste funny to you?" The other cannibal says " yeah because the clown has been dead for weeks."

thumb_up thumb_down -26

There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Josh Moran peels off his foreskin while watching gay porn.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A duck walked into a bar and said "ouch."

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops