Three penguins sitting in a tub. The first penguin says to the third penguin, "Hey would you pass the soap?" The penguin in the middle says, "What do you think I am a typewriter?"

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If u read thus your awsome .... And if your a emo kid with rainbow hair and a 3 inch penis then NO your bad

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A bus with 12 black guys is driven off a cliff. What is the sad part of this story? ... Our beloved president was not involved.

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two friends are hanging out, one says to the other "whats 5 plus 5" the other says, "you know i didnt finish school and i dont appriceate you making fun of me" the other boy looks away and walks off

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A child finally stood up to the school bullies! Recently the news did a story about a school shooting.

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why didn't the unicorn have a horn? It was a horse. Why didn't the horse have a horn? it was not a unicorn.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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if someone chucks skittles at u and says "taste the rainbow!!!!" chuck m&ms at them and say "Im not afraid!!!!!"

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How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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A seal walks into a club. And proceeds to die. Why? The seal isn't able to walk so it was crawling and a man was swinging a club to it's head, so it perished and he could feed his family. The Statement was censored by the FCC

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Why did the Democrat cross the road? Because the glorious leader ordered it for all minions

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dad was a serious alcoholic who refused to go to rehab. Being an alcoholic constantly led to him beating the boy and his mother. Eventually, the boy couldn't handle this anymore, and he committed suicide. Realizing what he had done, the father also committed suicide. The mother is now locked away in a mental hospital, for she couldn't hold grasp of the deaths of her husband, and her son.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Q: why did the plain crash A: the driver is a loaf of bread

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Why did the man ask the woman on a date? They were both single and looking for a unique, romantic experience that could possibly turn into a long-term loving relationship.

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A black man, a mexican man, and a caucasian man, walk into a bar with handguns. The three break out into a gun fight and everyone is killed in the cross-fire

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When geese migrate, why is one side of the V longer than the other? There are more birds on that side.

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What's worse than getting a apple and finding a worm in it. Getting hit in the face with a meteorite.

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What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

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What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

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AIDS

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your mom is so ugly, when she throws a boomerang it doesn't come back

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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