Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

what is the biggest lie in the whole world? -please drink responsibly

What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

A black man, a jew, a hispanic, and an asian are the only survivors of a plane crash, and end up on a deserted island, what do they do? Die.

What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

Why was the trucker making noises? It was having sex with someone

This will be the least popular anti-joke. Dislike this joke.

Little Jimmy's mommy loved to see the smile on her only son's face as he ate her homemade cookies. Due to lack of medical knowledge at the time, Little Jimmy contracted diabetes and died before he turned 30. Unmarried and childless, he was diligently working on his doctorate thesis on Astrophysics. His death marked the end of his family line.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

What do you call 1000 black men walking down a street? The million man march

what did the father say to his son whom had only one arm? hey son.

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

what goes ha ha ha ..plop? We are all going to die.

You're welcome. On to the next house.

I like to rape children, then kill them, eat them and defecate them into a toilet

Hey, I just met you And this is Crazy I have Amnesia I like trains.

How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

Why are black people so fast? They probably practice.

whats worse than someone on the phone during a movie? your mother queefing on your bowl of cheerios

What do you call a jew without a nose? A most likely kind and interesting anti- steriotypical person

How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

why do woman love the twilight books? i have no idea woman can't read

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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