Whats red and goes round and round? A baby in the garbage disposal

what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

How are this and that alike? They aren't.

How is an elephant like a grape? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

What did the smurf say to the other smurf? Smurf

How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

A man commands his dog to sit. However, his dog is poorly trained, so does not.

What's the difference between a pizza and a girl? I've stuck my penis in a pizza

Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

You know what's funnier than 24? 25

Why did the black guy get hit by a banana He was low on potassium and his friend threw the banana too hard

Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

A Mexican, a Jew, and a Colored guy walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says: "What can I get you gentlemen today?"

Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Elton John? They're both gay.

Your momma is so fat, when she bent down to get a peice of wood, she fell down the steps.

Why did Alec cross the road? He didn't, he was hit by an axe.

Why did the English man walk into a bar? Do get an alcoholic beverage to temporarily forget the pain of his recent divorce.

When life gives you Live Aid, celebrate the fact that you've just gone back in time 27 years and somehow cheated death temporarily.

Why couldn't Jimmy go bowling with the rest of his friends? His parents shot him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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