Why did the black man offer the girl flowers? It was his niece's birthday.

What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

What do democrats and fire have in common? They both do damage

It's that time of the month again... ...to cut my toenails.

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

Když si to Nikolas ,dejme tomu že Bihary, you know nuseng.. hahahahaha

-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting c- Moo

Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

Who do you call when there is a ghost in your house? You should problably call the doctor, you may be hallucinating.

So a guy walked into the doctors and said, "It hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor said, "Well don't poke your leg like that."

Why did the room go dark? Somebody turned the lights off

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

Why did jack fall off a cliff? Coz the hill was on a cliff.

Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

Haha, I get it..

You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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