What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Biting into an orange and finding Helen Kellar

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What is funnier than Miley Cirus getting a Record Album? Justin Bieber's voice.

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares...he didn't make it anyways..

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What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

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What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

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Why is the sky blue? Because it isn't red.

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What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

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Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

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Why did the boy ask his dad for a phone? Because he had his head stuck up a sheeps bum

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What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

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i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

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Q: Why do black people buy so many pairs of shoes? A: Because when they outgrow there old pair they need new shoes.

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Yo mamma's so fat that the gravity required to keep her on the ground is significantly smaller than an average sized human.

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Who has lots of friends, but smells like urinate feceas? Smelly McD, I lied about the friends.

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Why can't Hellen Kelller drive? Because she's a woman.

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What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

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Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

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What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops