i have alzheimer's, so i forgot the punchline to this joke

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What do you call an earthquake on Mars? There is not enough water on planet Mars for something like that to happen.

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This guy gets on a plane and leaves he takes a bite of a green Apple and says to sower then he takes a bite out of a red Apple and says to sweet so he takes a bite of a gernade and says to crunchy so the plane lands and he walks past a little boy crying and says little boy why are you crying because a green Apple came down and hit my dog in the head so he's walking along and sees a nether boy crying and says little boy why are you crying cause a red Apple came down and hit me on the head so he's walking along abd sees a little girl laughing little girl he says why are you laughing cause I farted and the building be hind me bluw up lol ????

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Barack Obama. Ok, come on in Mr. President!

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Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

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What did the strawberry say to the elephant? Nothing. Because it's a strawberry and strawberries can't talk.

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A: How can you tell a tree is an aspen? B: 'Cause of the way it is.

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what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

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Why did the man stop playing his computer game? The SWAT busted down his door and quickly pinned him down and arrested him for the murder of 7 families, he was charged for life in prison.

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Never go into your parents room with a blacklight.. -Ryan Vallee

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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What happened When The lion asked the dog of a soda can? The giraffe who is taller the lion or the whos the fastest?

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What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

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Q: What's big, black, and smelly? A: The unemployment line.

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What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Take away his glass of water.

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What do you call a black man wearing tights? Rick

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A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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(PC) What did the homosexual man say when accidently sat on a stick? Ouch.

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How did Allen Iverson compose one of the most well known interviews of all time? Practice.

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Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

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Ubisoft 'Very Impressed' By Pokemon Go, Working on AR game of their own.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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