Get on the boat.

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

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Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

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In Soviet Russia, the same thing that happens here, happens there.

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Why did the duly oppressed individual where sunglasses? Because the sun was bright.

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What's up with airplane food? Not sure, but last flight I was on they didn't serve any food. It could have been because it was too short of a flight or perhaps the recessed economy caused jetliners to cut costs. Either way, I didn't get a bag of peanuts.

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A man walks into a bar And compliments the bartender for his great service

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Who do you call when there is a ghost in your house? You should problably call the doctor, you may be hallucinating.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

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Kim Jong Un thinks that he is in shape. And when you think about it, he's right. Round is a shape.

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Person A - you must be tired, cuz you've been running though my mind all day Person B - i have no legs...

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Who's Juan? DIS ONE

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Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words are merely the smallest element of language capable of containing meaning and isolation and, as such could never directly produce the 4,000 Newtons of force per square centimetre required to break bones.

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What would you call the flinstones if they were black? Ni**gers

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? You don't call it anything. You don't drive a plane you fly it.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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a one fingered leper was sitting one day on the beach playing cards. When a stranger asked to play,hide and go seak. well the oner finger leper licked his invisible finger and said "which ways the winds blowing pete. .-poot-

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your tits.

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What do you call four black people in a car? A family road trip.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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Woman + Kitchen = sandwich

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What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

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Ah, sorry for my failed attempt at being a witty. Yes, it has been a long day, or so the saying goes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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