what can keep u alive for many years- -not being shot

What has 2 legs and smells like fish A fish with 2 legs

Your mom is so stupid that she was unable to make it into the college of her choice.

Why didn't Suzie ride her bike? Suzie's mother aborded her. She was never born.

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

Q: What did the clam say to the postman? Moral: "Hey its me the worlds only talking clam! How you doing dude!"

Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

why was the Jewish person accused of stealing money? because the police found his finger prints.

What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

Why did the woman go in a elevator with Ray Rice? Because they were both going to the 25th floor and stairs would take too long.

What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

Why didn't the 12-year old boy eat his birthday cake? He has diabetes and would likely die from the increased spike in insulin.

What do you call a truck full of dead babies? Not enough.

Dont be racist be like mario he is an italian who looks like a mexican speaks english and picks up coins like a jew.

Q: How do you kill a Brazilian Blind Electric Ray? A: Killing endangered species is a crime.

mary poppins' handbag is full of dick

Barney is a pedophile Loves dino molestation Stuck a dildo in his ass And died of constipation

Why isn't Michael Jackson good at chess? Because he's dead.

knock knock who's there? your destiny

How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

Q. Where do all funny jokes come from? A. The people who made them up

Why didn't 6 like 7? Because 7 was a huge racist.

what is big, white, and can't climb a tree? a fridge

How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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