What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

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Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

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What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

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roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than Nickelback? Nothing. -Win G.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

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toby limbers is gonna follow in his uncles footsteps, the gay ones

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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what did the chickpea say to the raison when he got called big but? Atleast i dont have a stick up my but.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This is a poem The End

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Dumb

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A man once had a monkey, and it made him very happy. then one day, his monkey ran away. So the man was very sad and screamed, "I knew i should have broken the monkey's legs!!"

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What do you call a black man playing a bass guitar? A bassist.

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Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

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What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Oh good I thought you wouldn't make it.

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HELP!!! I locked myself in my bathroom and can't get out! my laptop is running out of batteries!

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how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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