people magazine

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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Why did Billy fall off the tree? Why? Because he had no arms or legs. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy

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ever tried african food? they neither

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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The Chicken was crossing the road one afternoon, he was fined by a police officer for J walking He made it to the other side.

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A man jumped off a cliff and wished he could fly. He was hit by a plane

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2 people lived next door to each other. The man said "hi" and so did the other man. What is wrong with this situation. Nothing, just friendly neighbors.

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Dennis: you can make anything out of coppersulfate Austin: But copper sulfate can make things out of you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he got hit by a car because he wasn't aware of the dangers of not looking both ways. Bufoon

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A man walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "What'll you have?" The man replies "Surprise me." The bartender proceeds to mix cyanide with the mans drink and loses his bartending license and goes to prison for murdering a customer.

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What did the elf say to Santa I'm not making any more toys fat ass.

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Giant scorpions, red roses, adoption, the holocaust, bars, changing light bulbs, and fridges.

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fhfhfjjil;tyjgfkileg ryj ftrgndfhuiltyjgn

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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knock knock. who's there? 9/11

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I am back with more jokes! -Lets go Mets It is best to dislike this one

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Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

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Why did the Cookie Monster go to the Doctor? Because He had an inoperable tumor in his lower intestinal tract.

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Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

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How many Polacks does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to change the lightbulb, one to hold the ladder.

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wanna hear a joke? i dont like kids wanna hear a lie? im typing with two hands wanna hear a another? my hand isnt on my weiner

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Q:how do you fit 100 jews in a car? A:2 in the front 3 in the back and the other 95 in the ashtray

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What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops