What did the girl get with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

What did Woody say to Buzz? A lot. There were three movies.

Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

What do you call a mailman who doesn't deliver mail? Unemployed

what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

Q:Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: Because she has no arms. ..... Knock knock! who's there? Not Sara, she has no arms and doesn't have the abitlity to knock.

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

What do you call a chicken that can't lay eggs? a rooster

What do you call a cat in a piece of bred? An inbred cat.

Wanna hear a really dirty joke the boy fell in the mud

Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

whats orange and cant talk? an orange

Why did the black man die? Kidney Failure.

What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure

Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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