If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

Dead girls can't say no.

Why was it so hard for teachers to teach Tommy? Tommy is brain dead

What do you call someone who is bad at hand eye co-ordination? Dispraxic

Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

whats the difference between a European and a african an african has more pigment in his skin due to prolonged exposure to light

Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

whats worse than getting lost in europe? becoming the middle in the human centipede.

Your mum so ugly that she isn't married

The Princess is in another castle

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

FAMOUS DUDE:SWAG! Thank you, thank yo- HEY NO FLASH PHOTOGRAPHY, NO YOU CANT HAVE MY-KABOOM AUDIENCE: . . . YAY CLAP CLAP CLAP.

(A man goes to visit his neighbor) Knock! Knock! ...................... ................... ................ ............ he walks back home

There was three women stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin that someone shot with red paintballs.

Why does ISIS want guns? Because they wanted to kill. Duh.

Why didn't John get a present for Christmas? Because John died eight months ago.

what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

Women outside of the kitchen.

You dropped something.... Yo lip

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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