This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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Q: Did you hear about the fire at the circus? A: It was in tents!

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my friend said this website was funny, you know what i said?.... its really not!

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What does an Eagle and a Mole have in common? The are both of the kingdom Animalia, possessing many organ systems and cellular similarities. And they both live underground. Except for the Eagle.

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Chuck Norris and Bane recently had a fight on a bet. The result was Bane won easily as he is the much bigger and stronger man, and Chuck Norris lacks the skills he once possessed as a younger man as he is now 72 years old.

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Why did they chicken cross the road? It didn't. A van ran it over when it was halfway across.

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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Do you know what's the sexiest thing in the world? Sex.

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I dont often wash my hands in the bathroom but when i do its so people dont think im gross.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Why was Emily in Alaska? Because she and some friends had been playing Simon Says at a birthday party, and the dad had said 'Simon Says go to Alaska'.

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What is more black than a Nigerian marathon runner? The night sky

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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How do you make an idiot in suspense?

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In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

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Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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What's worse then falling up the stairs? Ketchup

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Guy 1: (to guy 2) Close your eyes, stand on one leg, spin around, and yell "I have never eaten a cucumber!". Guy 2: No. Guy 1: Ok.

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What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

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What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

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You know what they say about priests with big rosaries? I don't know, it's in Latin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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