One kisses says: I have had 3 bottles of water today and I haven't peed yet. His friend says: O you probably have a urinary track infection.

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Why did Suzie die? She ate too many fried twinkies.

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "There goes my income. I dont know how I'll support my family now, or keep my crops alive."

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how do you kill a man? slowly saw off all their limbs and then jump up and down on the torso and let all the organs fly out

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black —Stevie Wonder

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Whites black white and red all over? The nazi flag.

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What did the librarian say to the rude man who was talking very loudly? The librarian said "shhh keep it down."

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2 sheeps are outside having a great time One sheep walks up to the other sheep and says: hello The other sheep says: hello Now what I want to know: what ally do you get your drugs from

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An anti joke a day... really doesn't actually do that much

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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Why did Hitler kill himslef? He saw his gas bills.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the house. knock knock. who's there? the chicken!

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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What happens when a chicken with a goat have sex? nothing.

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Why is The stop sign bent? Because a ambulance full of sick kids hit it.

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

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q ggggggggggggggggg

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whats worse than sitting next to jack grindey nothing

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

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Next time someone says "I have mad money"... Say "whys it mad"

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George Bush told Jared Fogle that he did 9/11. Jared Fogle replied "I did 9 11 year olds"

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why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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