Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

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what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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Why couldn't the black man be an astronaut? He was not qualified for the Job

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What did Osama Bin Laden Say to Obama when they met? Nothing Osama is Dead

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What the difference between a black person and a piece of shit in a bucket? The bucket

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Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.

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What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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Two fish walked into a bar. They died. Because fish can't breathe out of water.

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Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

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What did the orphan say to his parents? nothing

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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Q :Why did the girl fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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