whats the difference between an iron and a priest? An iron is a hand-held device which presses clothes and a priest is a person who is authorized to perform the sacred rituals of a religion.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

Why did the woman drown in the bathtub? Her husband was holding her under.

Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

My arms get tired from carrying my big diick everywhere, well at least it's better than dragging it

Q: How could the black man afford to buy a TV? A: He had a well-paying job and a supporting family.

Q: What does one man with alzheimer's say to the other man with alzheimer's. A: Purple, because magic doesn't go through chickens.

Yup, I 100% agree with all the jokes that were made below this post. Chad's pretty gay.

How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

A Mexican, German, and a black man walk into a bar... They promptly exit due to the access amount of tobacco fumes in the air.

Woman + Kitchen = sandwich

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

what happens if you fart to hard? A.you shit yourself

Q: What's the difference between an Indian and a Trampoline. A: You take your shoes off to jump on a Trampoline.

What did the dead man say to his best friend? Nothing.

Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

Why did the cop shoot his 4 year old son? Because the little bitch ate his leftovers

How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

What is the difference between a urologist and a can of chili? One is hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine.

Brenda said she found a pill to stop the effects of aging! It was a cyanide pill, Brenda is dead.

What happens when a chicken with a goat have sex? nothing.

WHATS THE BEST AVENUE TIN SHACK AVENUE

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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