How much does a dead baby weight? the same amount when it was alive!

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what happend when 3 white guys and 3 black guys try out for a basketball team? They all made it because you need 5 people on the team and it is good to have an extra person on the team in case some one gets hurt, fouled out, late for the game or dies.

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what did the cow say to shabab?....... want some milk

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Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

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Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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A muslim and a jew walk into a bar. The muslim proceeds to detonate the bomb he had strapped to his chest, killing himself and dozens of bar patrons.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

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Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

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What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

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Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

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Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

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A priest walks into a drug den, most people would say this is pretty contradictory to his implied beliefs.

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Why did the teenager drink a beer? Because it was actually full of sizzurp

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

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What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

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I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

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If at first you don't succeed, go kill yourself

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Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

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A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

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What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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