Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

thumb_up thumb_down +8

knock knock whos there? your mom really? well whats she wearing a refridgerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the boy sad? because the serotonin level in his brain was significantly lower than normal.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo mama so fat that she probably has a thyroid problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Guess what? I like trains.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? No neither have I

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call it when a plane crashes into a school? A terrible accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Tim: Ya know what was wondering? Paul: What? Tim: Actually, I'm not wondering about it anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why does the room smell bad? because there's a dead body under the bed

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I had 99 problems Solved them all

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you get when you cross a RPG with a cell phone? A microwave

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

my egg roll

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What does a grandmas vagina taste like? I don't know -- nor do I want to.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops