yo momma so fat, it appears she has two chins

thumb_up thumb_down -19

There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The moment where Perfect Cell returns declaring he has become "even more perfect" There is no level above perfect :P But sure Cell, strive to improve further on your "perfection", oh he is dead nevermind. Still my favorite character, narcissist, with a touch of class, and a sadistic personality, what more can you wish for?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's love like? Some people say it's like a lotus flower, others say it's like an orchid... Personally I'd like to say it's like a fire at the bottom of you're soul-- like when people sin and go to hell... that fire burns forever???

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the plane say to the world Trade Center on 9/11? Nothing a plane is an object therefore cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the snappy dresser take a button off of a coat? To see a button fly! NO YOU IDIOT YOU DID IT WRONG, IT'S SUPPOSED TO ABOUT ABOUT A "BUTTER FLY" OMG YOU DOLT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I was going to write about anti-climaxes but then I didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what did the baby say to his mum? he sed bfirbvuirnvkjwmndckie

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A man goes to the potty.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's similar between the Alabama Crimson Tide and a maggot? They've both been feeding off of a dead Bear for 30 years...

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Me: Hey mom Mom: Hey Son Me: Whats? for dinner? Mom: I dont know

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I just found my mum has Alzheimer's, I hope it isn't contagious cause my mum has it too

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Two muffins are in an oven. And by muffins I mean jews. They both die a horrible death.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Two homosexuals are making love in the kitchen. One leaves for a bit and says, "Dont finish without me." Upon returning, white goo is spattered across the floor. Concerned that the clumsily dropped icing may stain, they promptly clean it.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the boy fall of his bike? Becuase he was hit by a couch.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Have you seen the blind man's new house? No. Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

One time there was a man walking down the street. Wrong, it is physically impossible to walk down a street, you can only walk along it.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "We don't serve food here." The sandwich charges the barman for discrimination.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops