A black duck walks into a bar. Duck: "I'll have a beer." Bartender: " How you paying for that?" Duck: "Put it on the tax payers."

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A man and a woman meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony was rubbish but the reception was brilliant

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What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

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hi jonny

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what is the best part about sleeping with twenty six year olds? they are usually very experienced in sexual intercourse so there isn't much awkwardness

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Why did the accident happen? The breaks on the car stopped working. Why did the breaks stop working? The driver was drunk.

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diarrhea.

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What do you call a deer with no eye? NO IDEAR!

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A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

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Q How do you make the fire fighter sad? A Kill his dog

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" the Eggman and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costume

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Knock, Knock Who's there? The Johnson Family was then heard on the morning news for letting a murderer into their home before being brutally killed.

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What's the deal with airline food? Food tastes different on an airplane. The atmosphere dries out your nose, the air pressure numbs 1/3 of your taste buds, and low humidity levels give you cotton mouth. These factors cause the food to taste worse than it normally would.

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Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

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Why did Hitler hate Jews? Because he use to get bulied by them when he was in high school.

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Q.How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A.1

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Why didn't the disabled kid cross the road? He didn't make it.

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How do you keep the crime rate down in a black neighborhood? Blow everybody up all at one time.

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What did the white boy say to the black boy? You're black

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? A miracle

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What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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So I saw a man trying to push a plane. I asked why. He told me to mind my own business and go get ebola. And that's why I left for Africa.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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