Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

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What did the woman say to the black man in bed Good morning honey

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What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Getting voted down to page 4067

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Why did the kids all eat their homework? Probably because they were starving to death and there was no other food source available.

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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why did the blue berry cross the road

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A guy at a baseball game....

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A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Theres a girl you like, and a you are playing football with friends. You see the girl about to get hit by the ball, but you catch it. She says "Your a life-saver" and hugs you "You scream touchdown!!!" to impress her, you spike the ball on the ground and it hits her in the face.

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hers a joke... japanese people

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Whats funnier than Dane Cook. The Holocaust.

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Eric is gay Ha

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What do Barbra Streisand and Danny Glover have in common? Nothing.

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Q. Why did the child's mother tell him to clean his room? A. Because his room was messy.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the squirrel.

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sit in the dark for about 4 or 5 hours covered in Vaseline with a huge dildo inside of your arse

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Why couldn't Jesus get a driver's license? Because automobiles did not exist 2000 years ago.

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What does a ghost get when he watches porn? A boner

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So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

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A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

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a very large and muscly guy walks into a bar and finds a scrawny white guy he asks him if he has ever been in a fight with someone bigger then him the man says no the large man then leaves the bar and they both continue on with their day

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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