what did your mom say to you? go fuck your self you stupid greedy shit. you start crying later in your bedroom, then your mom comes with a bag full of your fathers semen, and dildos. and forces you to drink the entire bag.

There's a football player who walks into a bar and sees a gay guy. The gay guy says, "So you're a football player, right?" The football player says, "Yes." The gay guy says, "I have a game of football myself. It's called fart football. It's where you drink a mug of beer in less than five seconds and then you drop your pants and fart for the extra point." The gay guy goes first. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds and farts. The football player goes. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds then he drops his pants and before he farts, the gay guy says, "BLOCK THAT KICK! BLOCK THAT KICK!"

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because the mas of the ice-cream gathered up enough potential energy to increase the velocity of said ice cream making a mess on the ground.

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

who should be competing in the paralympics? Brent the retard!

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

Did you hear about that guy? He had a wonderful morning.

What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got Alzheimer's, Who are you?

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot you racist S.O.B.

Godilla walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

Two black guys walk into a bar. One of them was white.

why did the kid drop his toy? a dog was ripping out his throat

why did the man have an axe in his car he kills children with it

What happened when the old man fell off the roof? He died....

What did the dog say when the tiger bit him? Nothing. Dogs don't talk.

im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

Rose are red Violets are blue all I what to know is what do that mouth do

What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

Why did Kim Kardashian's and Kris Humphries marriage last so long? It didn't

It is so hot out here, that it could melt an ice cube that was once in the freezer!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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