You know what's funnier than 24? 25

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I have read and agreed to the terms of service

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How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

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How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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mexicans fishing

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

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Are you thinking Arby's? No. My grandmother died of tuberculosis and it's troubling me.

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How are this and that alike? They aren't.

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A guy walks up to his boy and tells him, "Hey, if you don't stop masturbating you'll go blind." The boy says, "Who are you? Your not my father."

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Why do so many people enjoy these jokes. They are funny

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first

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How is an elephant like a grape? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

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Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

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Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

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Why didn't the man buy the sportscar? He couldn't drive stick

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Roses are red Violets are red I have Ebola

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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what happend when the magic man touched fire? He got burnt screamed in my ear and died.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What is big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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