You're such a dork you were found on the bottom of a whale.

Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

How do you make an egg laugh? You can't. Eggs are inanimate objects which are incapable of emotion, thus laughter.

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

Why was the clock off? Because it was broken

I did it. the Bulls fan Took a few hours on Microsoft word. then I copy and pasted it on this!

How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

What's black and sits at the top of the stair case? Stephen hawking in a house fire.......

Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

What do you call a lot of Chinese people in a confined place? A Chinese urban center.

What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

what is the difference between a jew and a boy scout? a boy scout comes home from camp

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

-What do you say to a woman with Two Black eyes?. -Are you really that dumb to leave the kitchen twice -Elder High School

Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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