Q: What did the black man say to his Ex wife after she placed a restraining order on him? A: nothing, he was no longer allowed contact with her of any kind and thus could not converse with her

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A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

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What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs at night? An experimental animal mutilated then exposed to radiation.

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Whats really down a black hole? I don't know...The last person to go down one never came back because he died of AIDS.

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why did every one care when i killed my self they didn't

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

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what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

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How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

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What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

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What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

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Ehh

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I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

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What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

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What has two legs and oinks? Half a pig.

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Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he!

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Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

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"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alan okay come in

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the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

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WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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