What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What's the difference between unicorns and black people? Years of slavery.

What's worse than nailing 10 babies to one tree? nailing 1 baby to ten trees.

Why was Eight in court? He was involved in Nine's horrifying disappearance.

How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

Did you know: it is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? - The boy scout comes home from camp.

Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

A man walks into a bar with a monkey...I forget the rest but your mother is a hor.

why did the 60 year old touch the little boy's penis? because he was a pedophile.

Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

how do you get a cat out of a tree? shoot it

Why did the black man go through the window of the house? He left his keys inside

How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

Did you hear the joke about the pencil? Nevermind it was pointless.

Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane where having a bet on who could swim the furthest without getting wet on their hair. The Swede could have done better... The Dane did surprisingly well. The Norwegian, being bald, was disqualified. Moral: I still have some hair left!

I like my coffe like my women Without a Penis

Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

I remember my first beer. It did not taste good to me at the time.

Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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