- Anti Joke

Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

There are two muffins in an oven. Since they are inanimate objects, they do nothing but sit there and bake until they are a golden brown color, at which point a man takes them out of the oven and eats them for breakfast.

se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

A Jew walks into a bar, he buys it.

What's red and can't find a family? A fire hydrant

What's the funniest part of a tomato? The skin.

A black man walks out of a store. He was carrying a receipt.

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

Why didn't the man tip his waitress? Because he's a cheap bastard.

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

What do you call someone without legs or arms laying at your front door? Steve

Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzhiemers Wait, who are you

Roses are brown Violets are brown Someone keeps shitting in my garden

A drunk guy walks into a car

What did one cow say to the other? Moo.