What's green and has wheels? Your mom.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road ? A. Because he had grown tired of living thus choosing to end his life.

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Detroit has a low crime rate

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Q: What kind of time is it when you fall from a ladder and are moments from landing straight on a operational circle saw? Moral: ITS TIME TO SPLIT!

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What is little,red and its in the corner??? -strawberry in the corner

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

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Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

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Why is Ray Charles always smiling? He's not, corpses rarely smile

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what happened to the retarded dyslexic? he retard on his 60th birthday and took up gardening.

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What is the best thing in the world? The opposite of the worst thing in the world.

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Chuck Norris was dropped twice when he was a baby, once on concrete and once on hardwood

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What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there. Not Mary!!

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knock knock who's there? ketchup ketchup who? better catchup with me!

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There's a cat, a dog, a rat and a goat... I don't know how the goat got in there?

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Q: Whats black and white and red all over? A: I am unsure for I am color blind.

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Son: Mommy can I have some cookies? Mom: Sure, they're on the top shelf! Son: But I don't have any arms! Mom: No arms, no cookies!

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

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Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

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"knock, knock" "who is there?" Gestapo

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Why did sally fall off the swing? she had no arms of legs. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops