Why did the girl drop her cookie? She had no arms.

What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? "Robin, get in the batmobile!"

A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

What does the redhead miss most at a party? Her father. He was in a car accident when she was young.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut you racist bastard

Why did the kid fall off his bike? His mum threw a fridge at him.

why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

What did Harry get for his Birthday? Nothing nobody likes Harry.

how do you make a boy cry you cut out his eyes

How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

A bear woke up from his annual hibernation to find that his stomach is growling. "I sure am hungry." the sleepy bear said. So he found some berries, but spit them out. "These berries are far too bitter." the playful bear said. He then found some honey, however was soon bombarded with a swarm of bees. "That honey is good, but not that good." the jolly bear said. He then stumbled upon a cabin. "I wonder if there is any food in here..." the curteous bear wondered. The events that followed are now reffered to by the locals as the May 20th Massacre. While no witnesses survived, the police reports depict that the Martinez family, a young family of 7 enjoying their memorial day weekend in their New Hampshire cabin, was brutally slain by a blood-thirsty animal who tracked each of them throughout the house in a period of approximately 45 minutes.

I guys look at this new game I bought, what is it, it's called penis it's supposed to be toatally hard

Q. What do cows and grass have in common? A. They both moo, except for grass ????????????

A priest walks into a drug den, most people would say this is pretty contradictory to his implied beliefs.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was involved in a homicide at the Children's Hospital resulting in death row right away and was involved in the killing of 12 other numbers on last Tuesday.

A man walks into a bar later at night & the bartender says how was your day the man replies "well I found out my mom is a raging crack addict, my grampa has alzheimer's & i have terminal cancer" how was yours the bartender says "I found out im Hitlers lost son".

How many Jews can you fit in a car? 10. 3 in back, 2 up front and the rest in the ash tray.

why is ur dad an alcoholic? he drinks a lot of alcohol

Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

what did pedobear say to the 60 year old man nothing he was too busy molesting the girl across the street

How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

Once upon a time, Ducks THE END

Jim: You wanna hear a funny joke? Tim: Sure Jim: Well, if you want a funny joke, this isn't the place to be.

How do you take money from a Mexican? You don't because they have none.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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