Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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whats the difference between this joke and other jokes other jokes have a punch line

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What's long and black? A long and black object.

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what do you call afish and a cat? a catfish

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Why did Sally fall out of the tree? Because She had no arms or legs... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Knock-Knock? Who's There? Not Sally

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Why did the guy fall asleep? Because he's in a coma.

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Arab 1: Du good bai me, and I'll du good bai you. Arab 2: Ye men, sounds good men. Arab 3: O man, no way. Arab 4: K, u wait...jus wait n see.. Arab 5: I no interest! Me so saudi! Arab 6: D'oh...ha, ha, haa! Arab 7: This is so bahrain...I'm going to go club some protesters.

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So a little girl walked into a bar... A concerned adult then told the bartender. The bartender's name was Jim. Jim then asked the girl if she knew her phone number. The little girl said nothing and the bar tender was perplexed at the petrified look on the girls face. Jim the bartender then called the police and explained the situation.Once the girl was brought back to the police station it was learned that she had been missing for three months in a nearby county. The police then return to the bar to find that the owner had multiple kidnapped little girls in a cage under the bar that only he and the kidnapped girls knew about before the cops and Jim the bartender discovered it. The police then arrested The owner of the bar. He stood trial and was senteced to death row, he remains there today.

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What did a boy dying from cancer get for Christmas? The news that his cancer progressed and he would soon die. He underwent a surgery that got rid of the cancer and he was cured. He ran out of the hospital in excitement and got hit by a bus. He recovered slowly, but lived. By this time it was June and his birthday, he returned to school later that year. He got called fat and committed suicide.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

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children are much like potatoes. when you eat them, they die.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Im a dog

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What did the shy guy say at the speech? Nothing

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What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside. A BMW doesn't have pricks on it's bodywork, for a multitude of reasons: - it would increase the coefficient of drag, causing an increase in fuel consumption - the pricks would fall foul of pedestrian safety regulations

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I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

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What's up? Your time.

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Yo Dawg, I heard You Like Kittens and Volcanoes... So, I threw Your Kitten In A Volcano.

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what did the dog say to the cat nothing because dogs can`t talk and if they could talk the cat wouldn`t understand him because cats can`t talk

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What did spongebob say to patrick? Im ready! im ready!

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Why did the white girl become a lesbian? Because she was raped and had no more trust in the male gender.

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Q:Whats worse than a dead baby in a barrel? A: 8 dead babies in a barrel. Q: Whats worse than that? A: A dead baby in 8 barrels.

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What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

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What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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