Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Because he always increases the treble input in his songs, and he doesnt have a rod.

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What's black and white and red all over? My dog after she was hit by a car (true story)

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what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

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Why couldnt the man buy food? Because.

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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A man walks into a bar gets drunk gets in his car and has a terrible crash because he was to intoxicated the end.

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what happened to the man that no one cares about? No one cares

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I like school Said no one ever.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get to the hospital before he lost to much blood from his stab wound.

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the kangaroo fall over? Because it fell over the dead koala

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Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was shot In the face. Why did the cow fall out of the tree it was stapled to the monkey.

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A man walks into himself. He is revealed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stock market crashed 600 points today, and his retirement account took a hit. He can't afford his car anymore.

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Boner

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Q:What's black, wrinkled and smells like raisins? A: A raisin.

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Q: Why do black people hate country music? A: Because every time they hear "hoe down" they think someone has shot their sister.

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Detroit has a low crime rate

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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How did the little boy get out of the forest? -He didnt, he was devoured by a pack of wovles.

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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You killed my brother and call me the antichrist? Its lovable: Jesus said on the cross, I shall return. Then he returned three days later to say goodbye to his people. Moral: What the **** are you Åsshats waiting for? The third coming? He died for their sins, not for yours... WELCOME TO HELL!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops