Yo' mama's so poor that she can't afford many of the privileges of everyday life.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

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Knock knock Who's there? A fireman. You're house burned down.

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

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Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

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What do you call a pool full of black people? a pool full of black people.

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? Because she was hit by a truck.

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The motto of those who live in the Bible Belt; "The Bible Belt: Where being obese is 'Genetic' but being homosexual is a 'lifestyle choice'."

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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What did the man do when he got home from work? Hit his wife.

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how many dirty stinkin apes does it take to put in a lightbulb? 3 dirty stinkin apes, 1 dirty stinkin ape to put in the lightbulb and 2 dirty stinkin apes to throw feces at each other

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Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

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What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

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What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

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Doctor Doctor! I think im turning into a carrot! Thats a side effect of the drugs Alice, We've just had your test results back. I'm sorry Alice, You've got HIV.

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WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops