A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Get out".

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who is smarter than a human? a nerd

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What do you call a Jewish dinosaur? Fossil Fuel

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a cow walked into a bar and asked for a large whiskey on the rocks, 'long day, eh' said the barman, 'yes' replied the cow, 'first a large moving obstical was cutting down my food, and then my friend was raped from his milk.'

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Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

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A duck walks into a bar, clearly ignoring the 'No Ducks Allowed' sign that had been placed in the window to prevent comedic scenarios.

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what do you call a gay guy? kevin

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Why did the boy fall off the sky scraper. It was hit by an axe.

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Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

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In soviet Russia, your dead because it doesn't exist anymore

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Robin, get in the car, please.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? I don't know, he couldn't open it.

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- Pete and Repeat are in a boat. Repeat falls off, who's left? - Pete? - F**k yes.

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What is the Pirates favorite letter? C

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What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

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What did the piano say to the guitar? "G, it's not A nice day. B careful, Dee." What did the guitar say to the piano? "F you!" What did the piano reply? "Eek! C you later!"

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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Me: Ask me if I'm an orange. You: Are you an orange? Me: No

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A child wasn't wearing knee pads when he was skateboarding. He proceeded to fall of his board and break his arm

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Q: What's so funny about medical records? A: You're not the one dying.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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What do you call potato salad in Iceland? Edible. The fact that it happens to be in Iceland doesn't make a difference

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What's grey and can't swim? A castle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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