There are two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other "dang, it's really hot in here." Realizing that muffins can not talk the other muffin wakes up to a very hungry man biting his face.

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how do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family

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So a Jew is walking on the street and he sees a penny, and he decides to pick it up because ever since the fire that killed his family and burned his house down he has been living on the street and he needs all the help he can get.

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Your mom is so ugly that you should buy her a paper bag to cover her face because she is just so very unattractive that it burns mine and everyone else's eyes.

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Q. Did you hear about the gay guy that's on the patch? A. yeah, that's a really big step, quitting smoking is tough

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why did the family get sick?? because i fucked a girl with a parsnip then sold the parsnip to a family with 4 small children

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*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the buchter.

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What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

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How many children does it take to kill a homocidal killer? None. Children should not attempt such a dangerous task.

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Justin with a hat.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Why do so many people like writting really bad anti jokes? Said Santa Claus

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Dumbledore dies.

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So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

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Have ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither has she.

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i'm hard

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Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

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An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

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What do you do with a Jewish kid with add( attention deficits disorder)? Send him to a concentration camp

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*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

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Your'e probably not going to laugh at this joke, it wasn't made to be funny

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WHY IS THIS SENTENCE CAPITALIZED? BECAUSE CAPS LOCK IS ON.

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A musician without any music walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Who do you think you are, a hobbit?" The musician without any music says,"yeah" and turns into a hobbit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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